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英语四级写作计划第三周第1天(4):把握组句技巧和用词原则类每日佳作赏析

四、每日佳作赏析

directions : for this part , you are allowed 30 minutes to write a short essay entitles say no to pirated products . you should write at least 120 words following the outline given below in chinese :
1.目前盗版的现象比较严重。
2.造成这种现象的原因及危害。
3.我们应该怎么做?

范文

nowadays piracy (1) is becoming more and more of a problem in china . almost any product , (2) such as tape , cd and hi-tech device , can be copied . (3) shortly after a (4) newly-developed product is put on the market , people will (5) unsurprisingly find its pirated (6) counterparts in the stores .

(7①) it should be paid attention to that piracy causing great harm . (8①) on the one hand , pirated products often sell well (9①) due to their (10) unbeatable advantage in price (11) in spite of their relatively poor quality , and the orginal ones , (12) on the contrary , sell poorly . (8②) on the other hand , pirated products may also (13) have negative impacts on customers (14) since those legitimate producers' enthusiasm (7②) may be greatly hurt (9②) as a result of money loss . (8③) therefore , (15) it is high time that we took measures to solve the problem (16) as soon as possible .

(8④) first of all , stricter laws and regulations should be (17) issued to punish piracy behaviors . (8⑤) moreover , (18) as customers , we should (19) develop our consciousness to resist pirated products . (20) only in this way can this problem be solved radically .

点评
(1)引出问题时常用的句式。
(2)插入语,表示列举。
(3)意为“……之后不久”。
(4)复合形容词,意为“新开发的”。
(5)副词使用恰当,意为“毫不令人惊奇地”。
(6)意为“相似之物”。
(7)被动语态使用恰当。
(8)衔接词语使文章条理清晰、意思连贯。
(9)表示原因的不同短语。
(10)意为“无可比拟的价格优势”。
(11)意为“尽管”。
(12)插入语,意为“相反”。
(13)意为“对……有负面影响”。
(14)since引导原因状语从句。
(15)引出解决办法时常用的句式,意为“该是……的时候了”。
(16)意为“尽可能快”。
(17)意为“发布,颁布”。
(18)介语短语开头。
(19)意为“培养我们……意识”。
(20)“only+状语”位于句首引出倒装。