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高校履历表中英对照:一份忍俊不禁的英文简历

面试人员给一位前来应征的男士一张履历表,于是就填了这样的信息——

  姓名:english or chinese英文的还是中文的?

  年龄:confidential(这是私人问题)

  身高:not related to the job(这跟工作有关系么)

  体重:varies all the time before lunch or after(随时改变,饭前饭后都不同)

  居住地:at what stage of my life please be more specific(那是一个特别的地方,我生命的舞台)

  电话:ericsson(爱立信手机)

  电子邮件:only give to pretty and rich girls(只留给漂亮和富有的女孩)

  上班时间:the shorter the better(越短越好)

  应征职位:a position that has not much to do but surround by pretty and young girls(找一个不做什么实事,但能被美女包围的职位)

  学历:graduated at the wild chicken university(毕业于一个你找不着的大学)

  语言能力:fluent in bullshits(侃大山是专长)

  兴趣:sleeping and sleeping(睡得天昏地暗)

  生日:正月初七

  经历:fooling around all the time(游戏人生)

  曾任职位:decent or not decentplease be more specific(高级的或者低级的都是一种经历)

  已婚未婚:still looking for a rich and beautiful girlhopefully can find in your company
(我正在寻找漂亮又富有的女孩,希望在你们公司能找到)

  未来期望:have a speech on stage and retire as soon as possible(只负责主席台讲话,并且希望尽早退休)

  希望待遇:lesser workload the better(比实际工作量拿得多就行)