here are the 10 reasons why men fail with women, and how to make sure you avoid every one of these deadly common mistakes...
number 10- being too much of a nice guy
have you ever noticed that the really attractive women never seem to be attracted to "nice" guys?
of course you have.
just like me, i'm sure you've had attractive female friends that always seemed to date "jerks"... but for some reason they were never romantically interested in you.
what's going on here? it's actually very simple.
women don't base their choice of men on how "nice" a guy is. they choose the men they do because they feel a powerful gut level attraction to them.
and guess what?
being a nice guy won't make a woman feel that powerful attraction to you. and being nice won't make a woman choose you.
i realize that this doesn't make a lot of logical sense, and it's hard to accept... but get over it.
until you accept this fact and begin to act on it, you'll never have the success with women that you want.
number 9- trying to convince her to like you
what do most guys do when they meet a woman that they really like... but she's just not interested?
right! they try to "convince" the woman to feel differently.
well, i have news for you: you will never change how a woman "feels" when it comes to attraction!
never, ever, ever.
you cannot convince a woman to feel differently about you by means of "logic and reasoning."
think about it.
if a woman doesn't "feel it" for you, how in the world do you expect to change that feeling by being "reasonable" with her?
but we all do it. when a woman just isn't interested, we beg, plead, chase, and do our best to change her mind.
bad idea. one that will never work.
number 8- looking for her approval
in our desire to please women (which we mistakenly think will make them like us), we guys are always doing things to get a woman's "approval" or "permission."
this is another horrible idea.
women are never attracted to the type of men who kiss up to them... ever.
don't get me wrong here. you don't have to treat women badly for them to like you.
but if you think that treating a woman well means "always getting her approval and permission for things," think again.
you will never succeed by looking for approval. women actually get annoyed at men who seek their approval.
doubt me? just ask any attractive woman if wussy guys who chase her around and want her approval annoy her.
number 7- trying to buy her affection
how many times have you taken a woman out to a nice dinner, bought her gifts and flowers, and had her reject you for someone who didn't treat her even half as well as you did?
if you're like me, then you've had it happen a lot.
well guess what? it's only natural when this happens.
that's right, i said natural.
when you do these things, you're sending a clear message: "i don't think you'll like me for who i am, so i'm going to try to buy your attention and affection."
your good intentions usually come across to women as overcompensation for insecurity, and weak attempts at manipulation. that's right, i said that women see this asmanipulation.
number 6- sharing your feelings too early
another huge and unfortunate mistake that most men make with women is sharing how they "feel" too early on.
attractive women are rare. and they get a lot of attention from men.
most men don't realize this, but attractive women are approached in one way or another all the time.
an attractive woman is often approached several times a day by men who are interested. this translates into dozens of times per week, and often hundreds of times per month.
and guess what? attractive women have usually dated a lot of men.
that's right. they have experience. they know what to expect.
and nothing turns an attractive women off and sends her running away faster than a guy who starts saying "you know, i really, really like you" after only one or two dates.
this signals to the woman that you're just like all the other guys who fall for her too fast... and can't control themselves.
don't do it. lean back. relax. there's a much better way...
number 5- not "getting" how attraction works
women are very different from men when it comes to attraction. you need to accept this fact, and deal with it.
when a man sees a beautiful, young, sexy woman, he instantly feels a sexual attraction.
but does the same apply for women?
well, after studying this topic for over five full years, i can tell you that women usually have their "attraction mechanisms" triggered by things her than looks.
have you ever noticed that you see a lot more average and unattractive men with beautiful women than the other way around?
think about it.
women are more attracted to certain qualities in men... and they're more attracted to the way that a man makes them feel than they are to looks alone.
if you know how to use your body language and communication correctly, you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that you feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman.
but it's not an accident. you have to learn how to do this. and any guy can learn how.
number 4 thinking that it takes money & looks
one of the most common mistakes that guys make is giving up before they've even gotten started, because they think that attractive women are only interested in men who have looks and money... or guys who are a certain height... or guys who are a certain age.
and sure, there are some women who are only interested in these things.
but most women are far more interested in a man's personality than his wallet or his looks.
there are certain personality traits that attract women like a magnet...
and if you learn what they are and how to use them, you can be one of those guys.
you do not have to "settle" for a woman just because you aren't rich, tall or handsome.
let me say this again: if you know how to use your body language and communication correctly, you can make women feel the same kind of powerful sexual attraction to you that you feel when you see a hot, sexy young woman.
number 3- giving up power
earlier, i mentioned that it's a mistake to look to a woman for approval or permission.
well, a similar mistake occurs when a guy gives his power away to a woman.
said differently, guys try to get women to like them by doing whatever the woman wants.
and that's another bad idea...
women are never attracted to men that they can walk all over... women aren't attracted to wussies!
number 2- failing to read dating situations
now i'm going to blow your mind... a woman always knows what you're thinking.
women are approximately 10 times better than men at reading body language. that's 10 times.
i know, it might be hard to believe. but, for example, if you're out on a date with a woman, and you want to kiss her, she knows it.
and if you don't know exactly what to do and exactly how to kiss her, and you just sit there looking at her and getting nervous, she won't help!
and this goes for all aspects of women and dating...
approaching a woman, getting her number, asking her out, kissing her, getting physical... everything.
if you don't know what to do in each situation, you will probably screw it up... and lose everything.
and you know it.
it is vitally important that you know exactly how to go from one step to the next with a woman... from the first meeting, all the way to the bedroom.
number 1- not getting help
this is the biggest mistake of them all.
this is the mistake that keeps most men from ever having the kind of success with women that they truly want.
i know that guys don't like to make themselves look weak or helpless. we don't like to ask for help. hey, i've been there myself.
let me tell you a little about how i figured out how to be successful with women...
about five years ago, i became fed up with the fact that i didn't know how to approach, meet and get dates with the women that i was attracted to.
it frustrated the hell out of me.
one night i was out with a friend, and i saw a woman i wanted to ask out, but i just couldn't build up the nerve to do it. i can still remember that night... right on the spot, i made the decision to do whatever it took to learn how to be successful with women and dating.
well, after a lot of hard work and trying all kinds of crazy things, i finally figured it all out.
i can now approach just about any woman and get her number almost instantly. i've dated models, i've dated actresses and i've dated nice, normal, regular girls as well.
it has been a very rewarding experience. i no longer feel that sick, insecure feeling... the feeling that, because i don't know how to meet women, i might wind up alone.
i know that anytime, anywhere, i can go out and meet attractive women.
以下是我总结的男人约会失败的10大原因，以及怎样避免犯这些致命错误的建议。
第10位 过于正派
你有否注意到，真正有吸引力的女人从来不会被好男人吸引？
你当然注意到过。估计就像我一样，你有一些辣妹女性朋友，她们总是出去和酒吧的混混约会，但是不知为何，她们对你一点性趣也没有。
这到底是怎么回事？答案其实很简单。
这个男人有多么多么好并不是女人选择约会对象时考虑的条件。她们选择有感觉的男人。
做一个好男人并不能让女人感觉你有吸引力。于是做一个好男人也就不能成为女人选择你的理由了。
我知道这似乎不合乎逻辑，让人有些难以接受。不过你还是得接受，除非你不想泡妞了。
第9位 说服她喜欢你
碰到了心仪的mm，但是mm对你不感兴趣，这时候男人都怎么做呢？
猜对了！他们开始“说服”mm喜欢自己。
那么，请听我一言：在是否有感觉这个方面，你根本不可能改变mm的想法。
永远永远永远都不可能。
你不可能通过逻辑推理让mm对你有不同的感觉。
考虑一下吧。如果mm对你没感觉，你怎么可能通过讲道理的方式让她对你有感觉呢？
但是我们却常犯这个错误。当mm对自己不感兴趣的时候，我们乞求、辩护、追求，竭尽全力让她改变主意。
第8位 凡事都征求她的同意
我们总是觉得凡事都征求mm的同意会让mm对我们产生好感。
这又是一个可怕的错误。
女人不喜欢男人问是否可以吻她们。
不要错误地理解我的意思。我并不是说恶劣地对待mm会让mm喜欢上你。
但是如果你觉得对一个女人好的意思就是“做每件事都一定要得到她的允许”，那么请你去面壁。
总是征求她的同意你就永远不会有进展。mm其实对总问她们可不可以的男人感到很苦恼。
你觉得我在胡扯？那么你就去问问你的那些辣妹女性朋友吧，问问跟在她们屁股后面不住地问“我能不能吻你”的男人是不是让她们很纠结。
you can't buy your way to her heart...
第7位 试图购买爱情
你有没有这样的经历？领mm去西餐厅，买礼物，送花，仍然被她拒绝。但是只送过她一盒巧克力的男生却抱得美人归。
知道我想说什么吗？这其实很正常。
你没听错，我说的就是很正常。
这样做的时候，你传达了一个明确的信息：我觉得你可能不会喜欢上我这个人，所以我打算从你这买三斤关心和二斤爱情。
你良好的愿望往往让mm感觉这是你因为自卑而做出的过度反应，而且有点欺骗性手段的成分在里面。
没错，mm会认为这是一种欺骗。
（your good intentions usually come across to women as overcompensation for insecurity, and weak attempts at manipulation. that's right, i said that women see this as manipulation. ）
第6位 过早的表白
另一个男人常犯的巨大和不幸的错误是过早地告诉女人他们感觉怎么怎么样。
漂亮mm相对稀少。她们得到了男人们大部分的注意力。
大多数男人忽视了这一点：漂亮mm是不缺搭讪的。
漂亮mm每天可能会被好几个男人搭讪。每周可能有几十次，每个月就有几百次。
猜猜这意味着什么？漂亮mm一般和很多男人约会过。
嗯，也就是说她们很有经验。她们知道将要发生什么。
于是她们也就经常碰上约会过一两次就开始表白的男人了。这种人mm避之唯恐不及。
如果你过早的表白，她们可能会觉得你只不过也是一个缺乏控制力、对她们“一见钟情”的男人罢了。
那么你就别这么做了。身体后倾，放轻松，还有更好的方式。
第5位 不知道怎样吸引女人
关于吸引，女人和男人是有很大区别的。你需要接受这个事实。
男人看到漂亮、年轻、性感的女人的时候，他立刻就能感受到性吸引。
但是女人是否也是这样呢？
嗯，经过我5年的潜心研究，我可以明确的告诉你，女人有除了视觉以外的吸引触发机制。
你有否注意到美女的男朋友往往看起来就是个一般人呢？
想一想吧。
女人容易被男人身上特定的品质所吸引，而且她们更容易被感觉而不仅仅是视觉所吸引。
如果你知道怎样使用身体语言正确地交流，你也可以让女人感受到强烈的性吸引，和你看到漂亮、年轻、性感的女人时感受到的吸引力一样强烈。
但是不能靠碰运气。你应该学习具体怎样做。每个人都能做到。
第4位 认为金钱和长相很重要
男人普遍会犯的错误是在还没有开始的时候就放弃了，因为他们觉得漂亮mm只会对帅哥和有钱人感兴趣，或者只会对身材高挑的男人感兴趣，或者只会对一定岁数的男人感兴趣。
确实如此，有些女人只对这些东西感兴趣。
但是大多数女人关心男人的性格和人品要胜过关心他们的钱包和长相。
有一些特定的性格品质会像磁石一样吸引女人。
如果你知道它们是什么并且能善加运用的话，你也就能成为让女人喜欢的男人了。
你不需要仅仅因为你不富有、个人不高、不帅，就被迫接受一个你不那么喜欢的女人。
我重复一遍：如果你知道怎样使用身体语言正确地交流，你也可以让女人感受到强烈的性吸引，和你看到漂亮、年轻、性感的女人时感受到的吸引力一样强烈。
保持主动吧。
第3位 做乖孩子
开始的时候，我提到过不要做每件事都要征求她的同意。
还有另一个极端，为了博取mm的欢心，有些人开始言听计从、百依百顺。。。。。
一个字：蠢。
女人永远不会爱上她们可以随意虐待的男人，女人不会爱上软骨头。
第2位 约会时无法把握局势
现在我准备打击你一下了：女人总是能知道你在想些什么。
在读取肢体语言方面，女人比男人要好10倍、敏感10倍。
这可能让人很难相信。举个例子，约会的时候，如果你想吻她，她是知道的。
如果你不知道做什么或者怎样吻，只是坐在那紧张地盯着她，她是不会帮你的！
这一点对所有的女人、所有的约会都有效。
走近一个mm，问到电话号码，约她出来，吻她，身体接触，所有的事情。
如果你在某个阶段不知所措，你可能会把事情弄糟，失去一切。
你需要确切地知道从这个阶段过渡到下个阶段的时候需要怎么做，这一点是很重要的。从两个人第一次见面，一直到床上。
第1位 不去寻求帮助
这是所有错误中最大的错误，这是让相当多的人与真爱擦肩而过的错误。
男人不希望自己看起来软弱和没有能力。我们不想寻求帮助。我以前就是这样。
让我来告诉你，我是怎样领会到泡mm的秘诀的。
5年前，我受够了那种百花丛中过，片叶不沾身的感觉。
一天晚上我和一个朋友出去玩，我看到一个心仪的mm，但是我鼓不起勇气去跟她搭话。那晚的痛苦经历我记忆犹新，于是我做出了一个重要决定：我要学习如何泡妞。
在经历了足够的实践、做尽了疯狂的事情之后，我终于觉悟了。
我现在能够跟任何女人搭上话，并且要到电话号码。我约会过模特，约会过演员，也约会过普通的女孩。
这段经历的回报颇丰。我现在再也没有以前那种沮丧和心神不宁的感觉了。
任何时间，任何地点，我都能出去搭讪mm。