chicago cubs outfielder andre dawson on being a role model: "i want all the kids to do what i do, to look up to me. i want all the kids to copulate me."
芝加哥小熊队外野手andre dawson谈到作为人们的榜样：“我希望所有的孩子都来做我所做的事情，都来崇拜我。我想让所有的孩子都来和我交配。” [嘲笑运动员四肢发达，头脑简单。这个运动员用词用错，本应为“崇拜、敬重、学习”的其他词，他用了表示“交媾、交配”的copulate。]
new orleans saint rb george rogers when asked about the upcoming season: "i want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first."
当被问到即将到来的新赛季，新奥尔良saint队右后卫george rogers说：“我想跑1000或1500码，不论这两个目标哪个会先实现。”
and, upon hearing joe jacoby of the 'skins say "i'd run over my own mother to win the super bowl," matt millen of the raiders said, "to win, i'd run over joe's mom too."
听到skins队的joe jacoby说“只要能赢得超级碗，我可以从我妈身上碾过。”，raiders队的matt millen说：“只要能赢，我也可以从joe他妈妈身上碾过。”
football commentator and former player joe theismann 1996: "nobody in football should be called a genius.. a genius is a guy like norman einstein."
1996年，橄榄球评论员兼前橄榄球运动员joe theismann说：“橄榄球运动中没有人配称天才。天才这个称呼属于诺曼爱因斯坦这类人。” [个人看不出什么笑点……]
oiler coach bum phillips: when asked by bob costas why he takes his wife on all the road trips, phillips responded, "because she is too damn ugly to kiss goodbye."
当被问到为什么到各地比赛都要带上他老婆，oiler队教练bum phillips说：“因为她丑的我都不想和她吻别。”
senior basketball player at the university of pittsburgh: "i'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes."
匹茨堡大学篮球队的高年级球员：“我一定会按时毕业，不论要花多长时间。”
clemson recruit ray forsythe, who was ineligible as a freshman because of academic requirements: "i play football. i'm not trying to be a professor. the tests don't seem to make sense to me, measuring your brain on stuff i haven't been through in school."
克莱门森新球员ray forsythe因为不符合学历要求而失去入选新人的资格，他说：“我是来打橄榄球的，不是来当教授。用一些我在学校都没弄懂的东西来衡量智商，那些考试题对我来说没有任何意义，。”
boxing promoter dan duva on mike tyson hooking up again with promoter don king: "why would anyone expect him to come out smarter? he went to prison for three years, not princeton."
泰森又聘用了他原来的拳击经纪人don king，dan duva评论到：“为什么总有人幻想他会变聪明？他这三年待的是监狱，又不是普林斯顿。” [prison v.s. princeton]
stu grimson, chicago blackhawks left wing, explaining why he keeps a color photo of himself above his locker: "that's so when i forget how to spell my name, i can still find my @#%#%@ clothes."
芝加哥黑鹰队左边锋stu grimson解释他为什么在他的衣柜上贴张自己的彩色照片：“这样的话当我忘记我名字怎么拼写时，我还是可以找到自己的衣服。”
shaquille o'neal on whether he had visited the parthenon during his visit to greece: "i can't really remember the names of the clubs that we went to."
当被问到在希腊时是去了帕特农神庙，奥尼尔回答：“我实在记不住去过的那些酒吧的名字。”
shaquille o'neal, on his lack of championships: "i've won at every level, except college and pro."
奥尼尔对别人说他没有“冠军命”的回应：“除了大学联赛和职业联赛，其他级别我都是冠军。”[还有其他什么级别……]
lou duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the spartan training regime of heavyweight andrew golota: "he's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning regardless of what time it is."
拳击教练lou duva谈到重量级选手andrew golota的斯巴达式训练法：“他每天早上六点的时候准时起床，不论什么时代。”[大误……不知什么意思。]
pat williams, orlando magic general manager, on his team's 7-27 record: "we can't win at home. we can't win on the road. as general manager, i just can't figure out where else to play." (1992)
奥兰多魔术队经理pat williams总经理谈到这支队伍的7-27的纪录：“我们主场比赛赢不了，客场比赛也赢不了。我想不出还有其他什么地方可以比赛的。”
tommy lasorda, dodger manager, when asked what terms mexican-born pitching sensation fernando valenzuela might settle for in his upcoming contract negotiations: "he wants texas back." (1981)
当被问到墨西哥裔黄金投手fernando valenzuela对新赛季签约谈判提出什么要求时，dodger队经理tommy lasorda说：“他想要回得克萨斯。” [参考得克萨斯州的历史归属问题。]
darrell royal, texas football coach, asked if the abnormal number of longhorn injuries that season resulted from poor physical conditioning: "one player was lost because he broke his nose. how do you go about getting a nose in condition for football?" (1966)
当被问到赛季里受伤人数明显偏高是否是因为身体素质不好时，得克萨斯橄榄球队教练darrell royal说：“有个运动员因为鼻子受伤所以输掉了比赛，在橄榄球比赛里你去哪里弄个新鼻子？”[后一句大误，不知道什么意思。]
steve spurrier, florida football coach, telling gator fans that a fire at auburn's football dorm had destroyed 20 books: "but the real tragedy was that 15 hadn't been colored yet." (1991)
佛罗里达橄榄球队教练steve spurrier对球迷说奥本足球队宿舍发生了火灾，烧毁了20本书：“不过真正令人难过的是其中15本都还没有涂完呢。” [意思是说足球运动员一般都不爱学习不看书，他们看的唯一的书就是小孩子玩的那种涂色书……]
jim finks, new orleans saints g.m., when asked after a loss what he thought of the refs: "i'm not allowed to comment on lousy officiating." (1986)
新奥尔良巨人队输掉比赛后，其总经理jim finks被问到如何看待裁判的判决：“他们不准我对糟糕的判决的判决作评论。”[“我妈妈告诉我说绝对不能说你胖。”“……你还不是照样说出来了！”]
alan kulwicki, stock car racer, on racing saturday nights as opposed to sunday afternoons: "it's basically the same, just darker." (1991)
赛车手alan kulwicki谈到在周六晚上与周日下午赛车相比的不同：“实际上差不多，只不过暗了点。”[这里的dark，可能有两层含义，表面上看是说夜晚肯定要比白天黑暗，深层次的可能指周六晚上的赛车可能是“黑”赛车，非正式的、地下的。]
lincoln kennedy, oakland raiders tackle, on his decision not to vote: "i was going to write myself in, but i was afraid i'd get shot." (1996)
奥克兰突击者队前锋lincoln kennedy谈到他为什么不投票：“我想投我自己，但是我怕被人开枪打死。”[请注意此人的名字：林肯肯尼迪]
frank layden, utah jazz president, on a former player: "i told him, 'son, what is it with you? is it ignorance or apathy?' he said, 'coach, i don't know and i don't care.'" (1991)
犹他爵士队教练frank layden：“我问一个队员说‘孩子，你到底怎么了？是无知还是冷漠？’，他回答‘教练，我不知道，而且，我不在乎。’” [无知=不知道，冷漠=不在乎。]
shelby metcalf, basketball coach at texas a&m, recounting what he told a player who received four f's and one d: "son, looksto me like you're spending too much time on one subject." (1987)
得克萨斯州a&m大学篮球队教练shelby metcalf对一个成绩单上得了四个'f'，一个‘d’的队员说：“孩子，看起来你在这一门课上花费的时间太多了。” [一般在美国的大学里，运动员的学习成绩都很烂。这里可以理解为一般篮球队员的每门成绩都是f，突然有人得了个d，教练很是惊奇……]