Question
我是来自中国江苏的陈玉，对我来说理解英语中的一些委婉的说法实在是一件很困难的事。比如我给一个朋友写了一个方案，他说：I hear what you say, 我以为他同意了我的想法，但其实他是不同意而且也不想就此再讨论。我怎样才能正确理解英文的委婉说法呢？非常感谢！
Helen: 我想大家以前可能也碰到过这种情况，别人说的和你理解的完全不一样，尤其是碰到在用外语交谈时，这就会造成误会，出现尴尬的场面。So how do you know what
people say is what they actually mean?
这个问题是所有学英语的人都会碰到的。I hear what you say 我听到你说的话了，像这样的句子，在英语里还真不少呢，以下几个说法你听过吗？你知道它们的字面意思和真正意思都是什么呢？
Examples
- Quite good.
- It's a brave proposal.
- I almost agree.
Helen: 以上几个句子经常在工作环境中会听到。让我们设想一下，现在你想出了一个商业计划，和同事进行探讨。你觉得是对公司是个特别好的方案，也是可执行的。不过他们也是这么认为的吗？
Example
A: Now you heard my presentation, what do you think? It is really going to be a great
product for us.
B: Yeah, it's quite good.
C: I think it's a brave proposal.
D: Well, I almost agree.
Helen: 从他们的回答上看，都挺支持你的计划，是不是？你听 it’s quite good 是啊，挺不错的。 I think it’s a brave proposal 我觉得这是一个非常勇敢的建议。还有 well, I
almost agree 我基本上同意。 可是，在现实环境中，这些回答经常仅仅是说了一半，后一半的意思可就不一样了。让我们仔细听听。
Example
A: Now you heard my presentation, what do you think? It is really going to be a great product for us.
B: Yeah, it's quite good. But I'd like to see some solid figures.
C: I think it's a brave proposal. But I need to think about it before taking it further.
D: Well, I almost agree. But there's something missing.
Helen: 听到了关键词“but 但是”了吧？虽然你的同事们都听到了你的提议，但是他们并不同意你的观点。他们用婉转的语言来说“不同意”，减轻对你自尊心的打击。有的时候，你的同事可能会不说“but”后一段回答，但是前一部分就是给了提示，靠你自己去领会他们真正的意思。
不过为什么英国人喜欢说反话呢？当我问我的英国同事时，回答是因为“礼貌”。
Inserts
- Well it’s really out of politeness. English people don't like to be rude.
- I think it’s just how they have been brought up really. How they've been taught to be polite, so if they disagree with something, they try to disagree quite gently. They don’t want to directly say someone’s wrong, so they try to make it sound a bit nicer.
Helen: 英国人不希望被人理解为无理没教养的人，所以就算他们不喜欢或不同意什么人或事情或东西，他们都不会直接说出来。这就是所谓有礼貌有教养的体现。 那对学英语的人来说，这可怎么办？怎么能够理解这些委婉的拒绝？
Inserts
Well you need really to be sensitive to the way they are responding to you. Listen out to
the tone of voice they use when they are talking. If they aren’t making eye contact with
you, then it often means they are not really wanting to say what they actually say.
Helen: 注意当时会谈的气氛和情况，留意对方是怎么回答你的。他们的肢体语言，回答的语气，语调都能帮助你理解他们真正的意思。
不过有时候你必须直接的问对方他们是不是真的同意你的观点，没有说反话，委婉的拒
绝， do you really agree with my view and mean what you say?
Well, I hope you enjoyed this programme. Do get in touch with more questions about the English language.