As a fan of horror films I often pause and think to myself: “Why do the theaters get polluted weekly with generic, ham fisted, and worst of all boring horror films? Is it my fault? Did I do something to cause this stain of cinematic mediocrity?”. Yes, I did. You did too. Every time you go to the theaters and pay money to see ‘Saw XXXVII’ you are telling the producers, “This is good, give me more.” The same goes for every time you visit Blockbuster or Netflix and rent the newest throwaway remake. Even when you go to your favorite film news site and click “after the jump” to see which lucky actor will be playing the new Jason, you are fueling the machine.
It brings me great sadness then to see truly great tales of horror be financially thrown under the rug. The brilliant Swedish vampire flick ‘Let the Right One In’ grossed under $10 million worldwide despite being adored by critics and fans. ‘The Host’, another critically acclaimed horror film that was released widely in the U.S., barely made 2 million. Luckily the rest of the world helped its box office substantially. Unlucky for us, both movies are riding the American remake train, hell-3and if history repeats itself they will be mentally neutered features. These film makers will look at the “bad ass” stuff of the original and try to replicate it despite not having a clue about what actually makes the story tick.
Studios do not hear you when you voice your opinions, when it comes to horror they do not read the reviews, and they definitely don’t give a crap about people bitching about the latest terrible remake on a blog. Studios only hear the sound of the almighty dollar. In the case of Sam Raimi’s brilliant new film ‘Drag Me To Hell’, he has given us a megaphone. The only problem is: are we going to use it?
‘Drag Me To Hell’ is the wet dream of horror movie lovers everywhere. From blood chilling terror to hysterical comedy to 93% on the Tomatometer, Sam’s new film is the horror movie to beat. Apparently no one believes me because after being around for two weeks the film has yet to break $25 million. Pathetic when films of the same genre, such as ‘The Grudge’, have made over $110 million. ‘Drag Me To Hell’ is still behind such sterling features as ‘Mirrors’, ‘Ghost Ship’, and ‘The Fog’.
If we don’t start supporting good horror films with our money our theaters will continue to be a dumping ground. I know you are poor, we are all poor. But now is the time to blow the dust off your wallet, wrench the thing open, pull out $12.50 and pay the box office attendant for what will surely become one of your favorite horror movies in the last ten years. If you’re still not convinced, here’s six reasons it’s worth your money.
6. Michael Bay Didn’t Produce It
michaelbayDid you ever pay to see ‘The Texas Chainsaw Massacre’, ‘The Amityville Horror’, ‘The Hitcher’, ‘The Unborn’, ‘Friday The 13th’, ‘Texas Chainsaw Massacre: The Beginning’, or ‘Pearl Harbor’ and not regret it immediately after leaving the theater? Neither did I. Film makers like Michael Bay’s name look great on a trailer for a film that has no bankable stars or notable directors. People get teased into thinking that these people actually have creative input on the films they are producing. This is not the case. All that Bay has to do is start a production company that he has little to no financial stake in, let the studios put his name all over the film in marketing, and receive a cut of the films profits. Good for him, but bad for all those poor people thinking they were going to get a Michael Bay quality film.
5. Character Development
The first thing to go in a horror movie are characters you care about it. Most frequently, in horror films, people’s humdrum roles consist of dying or padding the run time with cliché dialogue until their stereotype is identified. The slut, jock, nerd, stoner, bro, lovable looser, and the hot foreign chick are nothing more than a plot device so the killer can kill. A director like Sam Raimi knows that to truly scare someone you must turn your stereotypical victims into real flesh and blood people. 1501They must be people you care about and relate to. If you turn on the news and discover a group of crazies holding people hostage in Petco, you’re bound to be much more affected if you personally know someone in the store.
Raimi spends ample time developing Alison Lohman and Justin Long. Alison Lohman’s character, Christine Brown, is instantly relatable in a world dominated by status. Brown struggles to advance in her job, seeing that only sacrificing her personal values can she become an assistant manager at the bank she works at. She feels pressure to live up to her boyfriends (Justin Long) parents and she fights off a curse that is so terrifying it would make Eli Roth film kitten documentaries for the rest of his life. On top of that, she still spouts off one liners that would make Bruce Campbell smirk with devilish glee. While Justin Long is essentially along for the ride, his presence gives this movie a real heart. Despite the insanity going on all around them, you are still deeply invested in the relationship these two characters share. Sam Mendes this ain’t, but Raimi knows it’s the characters peril, not the gore, that will truly disturb the audience.
4. It’s Not A Sequel
ring2_base_01People enjoy the familiar, it’s comfortable, you know what is in store. What goes on in this film, you have never seen in a horror movie before. Around the time an evil toothless granny was gumming the insides of Alison Lohman’s mouth, I realized I got myself into something truly disturbing. Studios love sequels because they are easy to market, there are established characters the audience connects to, they can rehash the same story, and there is very little risk for a product they know will sell well. With little risk, there is little excitement and little pay off for the audience. It is time for the horror genre to shake things up a bit, try some original ideas and make some mistakes. They can’t be any worse than ‘The Ring 2’.
3. PG-13 Rating
Popular opinion states that a PG-13 rating takes the teeth out of a movie, horror or otherwise. Christopher Nolan showed us last summer that a movie doesn’t need an R rating to show gruesome and frightning things. In the same spirit, Sam Raimi turned the PG-13 rating into an opportunity to show us some truly terrifying things that don’t involve buckets of blood and tits. He bites his thumb at the rating system to make a movie far scarier than any R rated film I have seen in years.
Many film makers use the R rating as a crutch. Directors know they can get a primal thrill from the audience by doing next to nothing. The R rated horror film has become exhaustively routine. It takes no ingenuity or talent to have a film saturated in gore and unnecessary sex. With the restrictions of a PG-13 rating, it forces film makers to think outside of the box to deliver the excitement. Where most directors fail when such a restriction is imposed, Sam succeeds brilliantly.
2. It’s Scary
There is a big difference between being legitimately frightened and getting so grossed out that you need to look away and shout, “DAMN!”. Yes, Jigsaw’s torture machines are unsettling and morbid. But I doubt anyone left the theater terrified that some cancer ridden old dude will snatch them up in order for them to “play a game…”. ‘Saw’ is onto something though, old people can be scary as hell.
The slow painful crawl of death is approaching all of us whether we like it or not. Even if we ignore it, we have walking reminders all around us that beauty will fade, youth will disappear, and you will be back in diapers before you know it. ‘Drag Me To Hell’ plays with these themes. The old pathetic hag begs the young beautiful girl for an extension to pay her mortgage on her house. After the young beautiful girl denies her this favor, the hag accosts her in a parking garage before planting a curse on her. A really nasty curse.
When the hag isn’t attacking Alison Lohman she is being tormented by a demon. We never see this demon. Raimi knows, just as one time M. Night knew, your imagination can create things much more terrifying than what is on screen. Perfecting sequences that originated in the ‘Evil Dead’ films, he creates a truly scary monster out of shadows, wind, and invisible forces. Invisible forces that happen to bitch slap Ms. Lohman before dangling her from the ceiling as she screams for her life. The scariest killer is the one you don’t see coming.
1. It’s Funny
Humor is the key to investing an audience in anything. I am not talking about Mr. Freeze spouting off terrible puns, but humor that relates the situations with the characters who truthfully react in them. The best example I can think of is Heath Ledgers portrayal of The Joker. dragmetohell_seance_possessWhile watching him was terrifying you couldn’t help but be captivated by every move because, quite frankly, he was hilarious. Everything he did tinged with irony and a scathing sense of humor.
Anyone who has seen any of the ‘Evil Dead’ films knows Sam can make scary funny. Personally I think he owed me one after trying to make evil Peter Parker funny by dancing down the New York streets in ‘Spider-Man 3′. No worries here, he paid me back in full with ‘Drag Me To Hell’. This film proves that Raimi shines as a comic genius when he doesn’t have a massive budget. What he does with humor in this movie is simply staggering. Almost every frightening scene is punctuated by brilliant comedy. The important thing is that the humor isn’t in your face, he doesn’t stop to say “Okay, now is the time to laugh”. The laughs come out of the clever way he adds subtle detail that augments the tension and scares. I won’t spoil any of the fantastic comedic moments but there is a scene involving an eye ball that will make any ‘Evil Dead’ fan smile.
So save some horror movies from corporate greed and mediocrity. Go see ‘Drag Me To Hell’, you will thank me for it later.