Kanye West did not interrupt Taylor Swift's monologue during "Saturday Night Live" tonight. Instead, the country singer took a swipe at the rapper for stealing her spotlight at the VMAs earlier this year.
Swift opened her first hosting gig with the "Monologue Song (La La La)," singing:
"You might be expecting me to say something bad about Kanye
and how he ran up on the stage and ruined my VMA monologue.
But there's nothing more to say, cuz everything's OK.
I've got security lining the stage."
Jason Sudeikis and Bill Hader then appeared on the stage, looking like security personnel and flashing a sketch of West.
When Swift finished the song, she said," We have a great show. Kanye West is not here ..."
It wasn't a "great" show; Nicholas Fehn and "The View" need to disappear, "Roomies" didn't work. But there were good spots, like the "Fox News" cold open and "Bunny Business."
Swift was game for anything and everything, from playing herself in a bad "Hollywood Dish" sketch to a male ex-con in an OK "Scared Straight" skit to an teen with attitude in a funny "Driving PSA." She also pulled off a decent Shakira and an awesome Bella in a spoof of "Twilight" called "Firelight."
Highlight of the night: Amy Poehler makes a surprise return to the "Weekend Update" desk for "Really?!" (And Seth's still cute.)
Check out the clips below and go to NBC's Web site for more. What do you think? I've also provided the full lyrics for Swift's funny "Monologue Song," which also mentions "Twilight" star Taylor Lautner.
"Monologue Song (La la la)" lyrics
I like glitter and sparkly dresses.
But I'm not gonna talk about that in my monologue.
I like baking and things that smell like winter.
But I'm not gonna talk about that in my monologue.
La la la. La la la.
I like writing songs about douchebags who cheat on me.
But I'm not gonna say that in my monologue.
I like writing their names in songs so they're ashamed to go in public.
But I'm not gonna say that in my monologue.
La la. La la la la la. This is my musical monologue.
You might think I'd bring up Joe, that guy who broke up with me on the phone.
But I'm not gonna mention him, in my monologue.
Hey Joe, I'm doing real well! Tonight I'm hosting 'SNL.'
But I'm gonna brag about that in my monologue.
La la la. Ha ha ha.
Ha ha ha. Ha ha ha. La la la.
And if you're wondering if I might be dating the werewolf from 'Twilight.'
[She stopped to mouth "Hi Taylor," then blew him a kiss.]
I'm not gonna comment on that in my monologue.
La la. La la la la la. This is my musical monologue.
You might be expecting me to say something bad about Kanye
and how he ran up on the stage and ruined my VMA monologue.
But there's nothing more to say cuz everything's OK.
I've got security lining the stage.
It's my 'SNL' monologue.
La la. La la la la la. This is my 'SNL' monologue.
La la. La la la la la. That was my 'SNL' monologue.